….and dealing with a sociopath!! And I’m trying to figure out, which is the lesser of the two evils! Both are toxic to our health, and both are battles.
Up to this point, my sociopath has been sucking me further and further into his web of charm, lies and deceit. It would be very easy for me to take a ‘cop-out’ attitude and say, i was mentally weak because of my breast cancer. But I was not. I was still
believing wanting, to believe that the questions i had about him were my minds way of not wanting to accept what the truth was. And that being, this man is unlike any i have ever known. The master at charm, faked sympathy, the storytelling, the overwhelming attention. It was getting harder and harder to believe what was coming out of his mouth, because I started catching him lying.
My surgery for breast cancer is now 3 days away! I needed to know why, after 6:00PM, I don’t hear from him, except an occasional text. Which was very weird considering all day long he would
blow my phone up send multiple text to me. He always had some lame excuse (lie) as to why. And of course at first I believed them. Then one night, one of my friends said ‘do you think he’s married’………what???????? Married??? No way!! Hmmmmmm, I’m not going to say that thought didn’t cross my mind many times a few times, but then i would think ‘how could we spend so much time together if he is married etc’ . So the weekend before surgery, I just came right out and asked ‘are you married’? And I saw a look on his face i had not seen before…….the mask slipped……He vehemently denied being married, then turned that question on me as a ‘how dare i think something like that’. A skill that sociopaths posses, they are masters at verbal manipulation. So the question I asked, now came back on me as how in the world would i think something so horrific of him! And all he could say is “I have been here for you! I said I would stay by your side as you fight this disease, don’t you know how much I love you? I will do anything you ask’. ( except tell the truth’ )…So basically another skill (unbeknownst to me) that sociopaths posses is they will turn a question around and then start talking about something totally different. So to make me forget about what I originally asked. After that episode conversation, I dropped it. But my friends didn’t! All I can say is, it really is amazing what you can find on Facebook alone with just a name!