………one minute, one hour, one day at a time.
How many times have you sat there thinking ‘if only’, ‘why did they, and ‘how can I’? Focusing on these questions, and several more gets you nowhere. How do you get to the point to where you can once and for all let go of all the deep feelings of love, wanting and needing? How do you replace the constant thoughts about your ex?
The first and most important step is to recognize & accept, you are/were not involved with a person who is emotionally connected to LIFE as you know it. They are constantly on the outside looking in, without being able to connect with a conscience. With you accepting that your Sociopath will never, ever understand what their words and behaviour has done, is completely unacceptable. No matter how much love, compassion,
understanding , empathy, you have for them, you cannot ‘fix’ them. You cannot make them feel love on the same level as you. You will not make them accept accountability. When they open their mouths, be assured more lies and deceit will come rolling out.
Why do they not recognize what they are doing is so damaging, causing life long deep seated scars? Equate it to this, just as much as you know their words and behaviour is wrong, is as much as they believe it to be right. You have had countless hours upon hours of conversation with them, trying to get them to understand what they are doing is hurtful! More hours of conversations wanting answers. Only to be given more convoluted bullshit which sucks you right back into crazy. You open your heart to them, given them the benefit of the doubt, hanging onto every words as if they have finally seen the light and now will be honest. Don’t fool yourself. A narcissistic sociopath has no idea how honesty works. Remember, they are in a perpetual state of moving forward, conning the next victim at the same time cutting them down so they are superior.
The only way to stop your perpetual state of going nowhere, is to accept what they are, a person with an anti-social personality disorder. This is an illness, one you cannot ‘heal’, ‘fix’ or ‘repair’. Most all Narcissist and Sociopaths will deny anything is wrong with them, it is/was of course always your fault. It takes a huge amount of self perseverance, mental and emotional strength to walk away from them. Ask yourself, by staying with this person, what are you gaining? How is this person helping you to grow? Or are they continually sucking the life out of you?
As hard as it may be to understand right now today, you will be able to see them for who they are, and walk away. Take the knife out of your heart they put there, stop the bleeding, and cut the string to them.
“Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.”