I read a piece about leaving a sociopath narcissist and at the end the author put ‘do you have any comments or suggestions to help this particular person out of the relationship and have her own ‘success story‘? Is it really ‘success’ when we are able to ESCAPE the psychological hell???? I could never say ‘oh look I’m a ‘success’ story for getting away from my Narcissistic sociopath! I have permanent emotional scars! Nothing ‘successful’ about that!
What about innocent children who are mentally & emotionally abused during their childhood, and carry this abuse their entire lives! Would we call these children success stories?
There are so many, many women (&children) that are emotionally imprisioned by a sociopath and/or, narcissist. And all of us at one time or another thought ‘let me just give the relationship a little more time it will get better’. And as we know so well, it NEVER gets better. Because of the never ending mind masturbation done to us by sociopaths and narcissist, we become so emotionally attached! And mentally exhausted. With this emotional attachément, you are left, daily, in a state of limbo. Your life does not move forward- it’s just a continual spin cycle of crazy. Sure, there are good days with your sociopath, there are probably even great days! But in mentally healthy & mutual respectful relationships, these good & great days happen on a consistent basis. Not only when your narcissist feels he is loosing control over you and needs to fake being nice & caring. Or you threaten to end the relationship and they are not ready to give you up.
We have all experienced the FEAR of leaving an abusive, UNhealthy relationship with a sociopath or narcissist. When you know you ‘need’ to get away, you just don’t know ‘how’ to do it. We have such mixed emotions and it always seems the ‘maybe he will change’, or ‘I have nowhere to go’,emotions win out.
But you do have options! Staying because of the children, or no career only continues the abusive cycle. (I will have a post later about leaving with children involved). There are community services for abused women & children. There are half-way houses. You may feel like you lost your dignity by reaching out to these places, but let’s face it, how much dignity do you have being continually abused? Reach out for help! Reach out for support!
A Life Which Does Not Go Into Action Is A Failure