A Healing & Informative Site About Narcissistic Sociopaths

Heart of the Matter

What truly is the Heart of the Matter when you are involved with, or apart from a Sociopath? What answers are you seeking? What is the number one most painful emotion you are feeling this very moment?
We have established so many character traits/personality traits i.e. Pathological Liar, Cheater, Blame Shift, Toxic Poison, the ‘masks’ they hide behind {especially Female Sociopaths}. The way they so easily just disappear, only to reappear and act as though nothing happened!  and So why is it you just simply cannot get over this horrific pain? Why is it ONE person in your entire life has created a living nightmare? How did this happen?
These 2 statements I’m going to write, I want you to write them down & DAILY remind yourself of these:
Sure, you want to believe their lies! You want too fool yourself into thinking ‘okay, they finally have their shit together and we will live happily-ever-after’. You obsess day and night over and over and over some more about them. Trying to make sense of how someone can and IS so cruel! You beg yourself to stop the pain. Maybe you beg God to make it ‘all go away’. But that is the wrong thought process.
You have to go all the way back to day one, when you first met the Sociopath! {Read this article} Think back- nobody up to that point in your life made you feel so ‘loved’, so compatible, so many happy times/beautiful memories made. No one gave you the ‘high’ as the Sociopath did.  So, where did that person go? They haven’t ‘gone’ anywhere. It’s the ability to love bomb you basically to death, to drawn you into their world of pure toxic HELL. So go back to day one, as if a puzzle spread out on your table. Take those pieces {lies, happy memories, deception, forgiveness, disappearing, guilt gifts, nasty hurtful words said to you, lies after lies, affairs, actions not matching words, cruel words said to break your self-esteem, make-up sex, more cruel words etc} and start piecing all that together. You will find, your ‘face’ is not on that puzzle, only the Sociopaths as you were an innocent person sucked into the most unimaginable horrible relationship.
You have a yearning- undefined. What is that yearning? The yearning is simply WHY??????” Why did they do this to me? How could I have been treated so horribly? WHY doesn’t the Sociopath understand how much I Love/Loved them? WHY did I give sooooo much, with sooooo little in return? Why hasn’t the Sociopath contacted me? WHY do they appear to be so happy with their new partner? Are they REALLY a Sociopath? Maybe it was me?”
NO! It was not you! NO! You could not have ‘loved the Sociopath enough’. Their ability to inillate your head and heart is what they do to every single person they are involved with. Be it family members, co-workers ‘friends’ {we know they do not have long term friends}, intimate partner’s. Think about this; every single thing that ever went wrong in their life was because of someone else or ‘their childhood’ or ‘previous abuse’ or whatever lie excuse they came up with to prey on your sympathy!! 90% of the time, all of the ‘sad stories’  told to someone by a Sociopath turn out to be pure fictional lies!
So how do you recover? How do you get your life back on track? As I said, go back to day one, read RED FLAGSand then read DISCOUNTSYou will then be able to ‘see’ the pattern of the Toxic relationship, and how YOU always had to be the forgiving one, YOU always had to make amends, YOU always had to put their needs before your own. NOW, it is upmost important to start putting your mental health needs first & foremost. YES! You miss the Sociopath like crazy. YES! You want to think “well…………maybe they are not a Sociopath/Psychopath, well………..maybe if I just give them some space they will come back”. Unless you want to continue the life you had with them, then keep thinking those last 2 thoughts and live in HELL. And if you are reading my website, you know, there is/was something  truly wrong with the person you are/were with.

Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer.   denis waitley



%d bloggers like this: