A Healing & Informative Site About Narcissistic Sociopaths

The Last Word

There is nothing more self satisfying to a Sociopath than having The Last Word. Nothing screams ‘win’ more to them as long as they know you heard more delusions out of their mouths, and took the bait hook they sent your way.

It’s so easy to want to retaliate, even defend their word, deny their untrue allegations and so on. A Sociopath will throw verbal tantrums, use emotional manipulation, and use their self-centeredness in the guise of victim!! As we know, the Narcissist Sociopath is always the victim {insert sarcasm} 🙂  As long as you bite their hook baited with The Last Word, they will never,ever, ever stop. Ever! I have written about no contact  and realize there are times you truly do need contact with the Sociopath. even in the worst of situations. With that no contact, boundaries have to be in place for it to work.

How many ‘I’m sorry”, how many “please don’t do this to me”, “please talk to me I will listen”, “everyone says your making a mistake”, “I love you we can work this out”,  “I will let the kids know what a piece of shit you are” “no one is going to want you” “your the crazy one”….and countless other Last Words do you need to hear before you once and for all realize NONE of what they say has any truth to it whatsoever. How many times do we find ourselves feeling sorry for them because they appear to finally GET IT and so we give them one more opportunity, or we believe they are going to follow court orders, only to find we are having ONE MORE last word. 

The frustration lies in you know what is the truth, you know what court orders are and follow them, you know the lies spread about you are so hurtful. You don’t live in the land of denial and delusions. You love and loved with an open heart free of conditions. So when you are dealing with an individual {or set of parent’s} and everything you know to be morally correct, ethically right, legally in place, the Sociopath has a complete opposite view, and/or no regard to those. Trying to reason with, or have common sense sink in, is futile! I know it is difficult, very difficult, to understand how another human being can be so vile, so viscous and cause so much hurt/anger/frustration in another person, and/or children. There truly is not a ‘blanket’ reason why…..every Narcissistic Sociopath operates the same, each have varying degree’s of abuse. The only difference is……the names and faces. However, they all want The Last Word 

have the maturity to know that sometimes silence is more powerful than having the last word      orebela gbenga

©SociopathLife.Com

25 Responses to “The Last Word”

  1. Haldun

    Let them win! That’s going to be their tale to the next victim. Until the next victim sees the truth…. And so forth…So they will go in their circle of emptiness.. Let them have the last word. You won’t loose anything…

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  2. revgerry

    Hi Tela, love the concept and it’s so true.

    Hope everything is well in Tela’s world; I have been really busy. I have written 70 pieces for other people in 7 months, and that’s a lot. At 72, who knew I could re-invent myself yet again? I am learning and growing in insight, always a good thing.

    What I gave up though was time to hang out in bloggerland. Today had some free time, just stopping by some old friends to say HI.

    hugs,
    Gerry

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • Tela

      Hello Gerry! So nice to see you on WP. I have thought of you often {and have missed your postings} as they would give me a sense of Peace. Congratulations on the writings for others…..I’m still waiting for your e-book, or hard copy book. Much love to you! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  3. anyonehaveaflashlight

    I like that “As long as you bite their hook baited with The Last Word, they will never,ever, ever stop.” It is so true. So far no contact has been a great gift to me. I’m not biting that hook anymore.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Tela

      Thank you @anyonehaveaflashlight for your comment. Keep up the no contact. I know at times it is so difficult! However, you can do it!! And don’t bite any more rotten baited hooks 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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      • anyonehaveaflashlight

        I was telling my husband last night that she will keep on trying to contact me. I don’t think she realizes yet that I’m done with her. He shrugged and said so you just don’t answer. It amazes me how he doesn’t understand how her calling can make that pull in your gut happen. So far the baited hooks look rotten. I hope they always look that way.

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      • Tela

        It’s not nearly that easy as ‘just don’t answer’. When the phone rings, and you see her name so many different emotions hit at once….and one being why couldn’t she just love me, without conditions, without restrictions. That is one of the most difficult things for children/adults of Narcissistic parent’s in trying to understand how they just simply cannot love. I would suggest blocking her, but it appears by your boundaries you have in place you are strong enough to take on no more of her abuse. So proud of you!!!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • anyonehaveaflashlight

        I find it very interesting and heartbreaking to speak to people who understand how it feels. You most certainly do understand it. Something shifted for me and I see her from outside of our “relationship” (if you can call it that). It’s always so much easier to see what is wrong when you aren’t in it. It is amazing to see it like this. I can see every tactic exactly for what it is without an emotional attachment to it. She really is a master chess player lol. I just never saw it that way before this year.

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      • Tela

        The something that ‘shifted’ may be because you, yourself are a mother. You know what it is, and how it feels to love unconditionally. You know how notto manipulate your children’s thoughts & actions simply for your benefit. It is also sad when we realize that there truly is something missing in a partner/parent. That these people are simply skirting on the outside of their feelings/emotions without ever really engaging them. And that hurts us, so deeply. So many of our thoughts and emotions are of anger/hurt/disappointment/defense, that when the feelings of sadness come into our minds, we get angry for feeling that!! It’s crazy for sure! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • anyonehaveaflashlight

        I think being a mother is a part of it. The other part seems to come from a decision I made earlier this year. I wanted to live without needing outside approval or validation. Once I did that other things started to improve and then I was able to go no contact. When I don’t need her to validate or approve of me I can do what is right and not feel guilty about it. She can’t shame me when I am being honest with myself. I don’t know if that makes sense.

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  4. laura

    I experienced abusers always wanting to have the last word,as if that would prove they were right.I’ve got news for all abusers.They are still wrong,even if i ran out of words.I always feel like a coward when i let abusers have the last word.Instead of feeling empowered,i feel i lost another battle.Abusers are so good with words,that sometimes their arguments seem almost logical and convincing.What should i do if i want to have the last word and to leave abusers humiliated and blocked,instead of me?

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Tela

      Thank you Laura for your comment. Instead of feeling humiliated, try and look at is as your are finally free of the abuse. You also have the ability to block the abuser(s). If your wanting to have the Last Word as you feel you need to defend whatever verbal garbage comes out of their mouths (or on text), all you do in enable them to continue. So turn the tables on the abuser(s) and stop the war with words, block them and that in itself will give you some empowerment. It is taking that first step that is the hardest……

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  5. MeAndDating

    Like a bully needs someone to bully, every nutter needs an audience…so who needs who more? Once you realize that you have power in the relationship, it’s up to you to decide when and how to use it. If uninterested in this person, you then have ALL the power…I used it to exact revenge…

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Tela

      You are so right about a bully needing someone to bully!! Most often they are a verbal bully, and some physical. Thank you for your comment. I don’t necessarily agree with revenge, but if that is what you needed to move forward then I hope it worked out for you 😉

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  6. beautifulpain33

    I have just learnt this lesson all over again how many times do I have to break the no contact for the same result , no more defending or trying to reason with a sociopath all it does is leave you feeling exhausted and hopeless ..hope things are ok with yourself iv started my blog stronger than I was all over again 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Tela

      Thank you Angel for your comment. There is a saying that helped me put in place the no contact, and therefore the Last Words “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. And often times the verbal tantrums and emotional assaults left me feeling that way. However, no more! 🙂

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      • secretangel

        Amen… I totally agree. I love that saying. I first heard it as I watched the movie “Princess Diaries” with my daughter. It is very true and I pray that more will be empowered to believe it. God bless you, my friend. You are a blessing to many.

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  7. DogDharma

    Tela, this post couldn’t have come with better timing. A few days ago, I had the most bizarre experience. I recently blogged about something that happened 14 years ago, one of my experiences with a sociopath. There is absolutely nothing in my blog that would reveal who I am via a search engine. Only if someone stumbled across my blog by accident and knew me well might they guess who I am.

    Lo & behold, the perpetrator I wrote about, 14 years after the incident, contacted me via my blog with a short, stupid note. I had not revealed who she was in the post, nor given any information that would have been recognizable via search engine. Her note was like a “poke in the eye,” a “haha, I’m still out here unscathed.” A Last Word.

    It was very powerful to realize that I had all the power, simply by not responding and letting her wonder if I’d ever received the note. Her Last Word was a flop, and I feel more empowered than ever.

    Liked by 2 people

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